It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
